He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
