We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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