it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
