he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
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