we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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