What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
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im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
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What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.