he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
