my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
