He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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