Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Randomize
