LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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