Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
