my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
