New low: just hacked my moms facebook
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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