where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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