i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
