yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
