Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize