im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize