Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I have already put on my inside pants.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
