Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
