She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
