just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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