Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize