i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
