You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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