I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Randomize