your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
