Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
