Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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