It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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