Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS