She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
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