new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
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