whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
