he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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