Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
