We're facebook friends in real life
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
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