found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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