I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
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