I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize