I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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