I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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