Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.