never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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