hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
