so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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