oh god the rape fog is back!
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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