Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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