You're completely useless in the revolution.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
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