Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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