my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Randomize
